Dear Mica,
I'm writing this letter to you, as I do every year on your birthday, and I still can't process the fact that today is your last day being 12. Tomorrow is your birthday, and you will be 13, which means that I will officially say goodbye to my child and welcome my teenager. Girl! you are a teenager and, in my mind, you’re still the little child who wanted the strings from every sweatshirt of mine. I think it is time for me to fast forward a few years.
This has been the fastest 13 years of my life. You are my one and only, Mica. The princess that made me a mom. You are the one God blessed me with to be mine forever. There was a day, not long ago, when I wondered if we would ever reach this sweet spot. You know, the one where we could have a nice chat, watch a movie together, go places, and more. And I must say that I think we have both grown up. You matured, I chilled out and we are now navigating this tween, now teen, thing together instead of working against the tide.
You have remained fiercely independent and so much more mature than I ever was at your age. Nobody ever told me that parenting was going to be so challenging yet so beautifully rewarding. I feel every emotion that you experienced tenfold. Every scrape and bruise, every victory, every heartache. It was exactly like I was told, "Having a child is like having your heartbeat outside of your body."
You are so passionate about your violin, art, music, books, and cinematography. You work so very hard for your grades, and it's just a gift to have all of you at school (not my imagination - your teachers have said it themselves) and in this house. You bring light and joy to my life and to those around you.
I know you know that I am not perfect and have made many mistakes; however, all of those moments though, the good, the bad, the easy, and the difficult, have shaped you. I hope one day you will understand that what you say is important to me, and I care. I care about you more than anybody and will always be your biggest ally and most ardent fan. I promise you I will continue to show up for you at your concerts, school events, field trips, or just in general, even when you say you do not want me there.
I will surely continue to indulge you in ways that I probably should not. Please know that I will also be challenging when needed and that you will not always like me. You will want to jump up and down and scream at me. It will be okay. We will be ok. I will still love you. You will not know it at the time, but I will tell you "no" at times because it is best for you. Forgive me for using the exact catchphrases that I once said I would never repeat, like, "I'm a Latino mom, and I don't agree with that. Use me as your excuse, but you are not going to the sleepover." Unfortunately, it is just part of the growing-up package. As someone very wise once said, "It's better that you cry now than I cry later." And, as I always tell you, when you have a child, you will understand. Trust me on that.
You will have only five more years until you are considered an adult. Honor and respect them. These are magical, formative years. You will learn to drive a car, enter high school, earn your first official taxable dollar, make lots of new friends, and possibly fall in love. You will not understand why some people are mean to you. That's okay. It will have nothing to do with you. Look for the positive. Accept change. Sometimes, life will be challenging, but you will persevere. Each day you will grow and let go of me a little more. I will always be here for you whenever you need me, though.
Mica, you are one of the most determined, focused children I have ever met. Embrace your big heart, honor your values, and, most important, always believe in yourself. Be proud of who you are!
I look at you and see myself in so many ways, only you are the better version of me - the version I always wished I was... more confident, more adventurous, less neurotic and so very wise beyond your years.
Never forget that your worth is not determined by a jean size - your body is your perfectly crafted temple, - continue to grow your tribe of friends - you are amazing at choosing them, - remember that boys can always wait, believe that you are smart, capable, and stronger than you think - God has gifted you with some pretty spectacular things such as your worth ethic, your goal setting, your tenacity, and your sweetheart and I know life has some pretty fabulous things in store for you, - you have been blessed with a brilliant mind - use it for good, - trust your gut and never lose your sweet, kind, giving spirit - I am eternally proud to have the honor of being your mom.
History and experience tell me that these next five years will fly. It sure will be a grand adventure for both of us. Let’s go make it great! I love you so, so much, my pretty girl and I wish you the best birthday yet. Once again, I am so very proud of you, and welcome to your teens!
Your biggest fan,
Tu ma
