Sunscreen and much more ;)

"Honey, wear sunscreen".

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now...

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Oh, never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded. But trust me, in 30 years, you’ll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can’t grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked. 

Don’t worry about the future. Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind, the kind that blindside you at 4 pm on some idle Tuesday. 

Do one thing that scares you every day.

Sing. 

Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts. Don’t put up with people who are reckless with yours. 

Floss. 

Don’t waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes you’re behind. The race is long and, in the end, it’s only with yourself.

Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how. 

Keep your old love letters. Throw away your old bank statements. 

Stretch.

Don’t feel guilty if you don’t know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives. Some of the most interesting 40-year-olds I know still don’t. 

Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your knees. You’ll miss them when they’re gone. 

Maybe you’ll marry, maybe you won’t. Maybe you’ll have children, maybe you won’t. Maybe you’ll divorce, maybe you’ll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don’t congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody else’s.

Enjoy your body. Use it every way you can. Don’t be afraid of it or of what other people think of it. It’s the greatest instrument you’ll ever own. 

Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but your living room. 

Read the directions, even if you don’t follow them.

Do not read beauty magazines. They will only make you feel ugly. 

Get to know your parents. You never know when they’ll be gone for good. Be nice to your cousins. They’re your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.

Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were young. 

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard. Live in Buenos Aires once, but leave before it makes you soft. Travel. 

Accept certain inalienable truths: Prices will rise. Politicians will philander. You, too, will get old. And when you do, you’ll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders. 

Respect your elders.

Don’t expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund. Maybe you’ll have a wealthy spouse. But you never know when either one might run out. 

Don’t mess too much with your hair or by the time you’re 40 it will look 85. 

Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it’s worth. But trust me on the sunscreen."

Strangely enough, the older I get the more of the benefits of wearing sunscreen I understand. Well, except for the fact that I am a little more forgetful when it comes to me. Oopssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss...

Good days all around us

Sometimes life seems hard. Sometimes I have days that are just not good days. There are some days I feel like nothing is going to go quite right and maybe I shouldn't have gotten out of bed.

Then there are things that bring me back to reality. There is inspiration that helps me see how small my problems are in the grand scheme of things. I think about how beautiful our life is as a family of three. I think of the love and  support that surrounds us. Maybe even the bad days are good days after all.

These words by Brother David Steindl-Rast really put things into perspective for me. It reminds me how beautiful life is, the gift of life.

"You think this is just another day in your life. It's not just another day; it's the one day that is given to you today. It's given to you. It's a gift. It's the only gift that you have right now, and the only appropriate response is gratefulness. If you do nothing else but to cultivate that response to the great gift that this unique day is, if you learn to respond as if it were the first day of your life, and the very last day, then you will have spent this day very well.

Begin by opening your eyes and be surprised that you have eyes you can open, that incredible array of colors that is constantly offered to us for pure enjoyment. Look at the sky. We so rarely look at the sky. We so rarely note how different it is from moment to moment with clouds coming and going. We just think of the weather, and even of the weather we don't think of all the many nuances of weather. We just think of good weather and bad weather. This day right now has unique weather, maybe a kind that will never exactly in that form come again. The formation of clouds in the sky will never be the same that it is right now. Open your eyes. Look at that.

Look at the faces of people that you meet. Each one has an incredible story behind their face, a story that you could never fully fathom, not only their own story, but the story of their ancestors. We all go back so far. And in this present moment on this day all the people you meet, all that life from generations and from so many places all over the world, flows together and meets you here like a life-giving water, if you only open your heart and drink.

Open your heart to the incredible gifts that civilization gives to us. You flip a switch and there is electric light. You turn a faucet and there is warm water and cold water. It's a gift that millions and millions in the world will never experience.

So these are just a few of an enormous number of gifts to which you can open your heart. And so I wish for you that you would open your heart to all these blessings and let them flow through you, that everyone whom you will meet on this day will be blessed by you; just by your eyes, by your smile, by your touch, just by your presence. Let the gratefulness overflow into blessing all around you, and then it will really be a good day".    

I hope you see and believe in the "Good Days" all around us.

Wordless Thursday

You´re a miracle... my miracle!

Today I wanted to take a moment to let you know how very thankful I am for you...

I always knew that I wanted to be a mommy, but I never knew it would be like this. My heart has grown in ways I didn't know was possible since you came into our lives. You are a miracle, my miracle! To think of the way you started as something smaller than a pinpoint, that my body partnered with God to fashion your little fingers and your little toes, it amazes me and takes my breath away.

Every moment and every stage with you has been my favorite. Each day I don't think I could possibly love you anymore and then somehow the next day...I do. When you were first born, the happiness I felt cuddling you in my arms was unsurpassed. Then you crawled and said "ma-má - mom" (and later on "pa-pá - dad") and started to toddle, and my heart swelled with joy. This past year has been an amazing adventure, because while we always had our own way of communicating, you've been learning how to really communicate in leaps and bounds. Every day is something new, and to spend each day exploring, learning and growing with you is truly magical.

You are such a little love. While not always gentle, you are so caring. You cry when we watch a video where someone else is crying just because it breaks your heart to see someone else feel sad. Your love is never in short supply. You are so giving with your hugs, kisses and words of love. When you put your arms around me and tell me that you love me "muto - so much" I think it just doesn't get any better.

The other day, I got you dressed in the morning (you are starting to have more and more of a voice in what you wear each day). After we finished, you ran, stood in front of the mirror, and twirled around. "linda! - pretty!", you exclaimed. While you were twirling and giggling, a smile quickly stretched across my face and I could feel the dampness of tears forming in my eyes. You are so right. You are so beautiful inside and out, and I hope you will always know how beautiful you really are. I hope you will always know what a joy, a blessing and a miracle you are.

I am so incredibly thankful for every second you are in the world and I hope you will always know it!

Letter to my sunshine: 22 months

Dear Micaela,

I have no idea where the last month went. It feels like I sat down yesterday to write you a letter saying that you were 21 months old.

On that note, it feels like a couple days ago I came home, tucked you in your little crib, and called every friend and relative I could think of to announce your birth.

This month has been incredible in so many ways. You make jokes! You now know most of your colors! And most of your shapes! You fell in love with morcilla sausage! And white sausage! You can string words together to communicate a point! You tell stories! You make-believe!

But underneath all of that incredible is a touch of bitter. When I was ordering photos to try to make you an album, I realized that I no longer look at pictures of your infancy and see YOU. I just see another baby. A cute baby, sure, but not as cute as you are right now. And when I look at you right now, when I clasp your cheeks and bring your nose to mine and nuzzle it back and forth and then WHOOPS! swallow little irresistible you right up? I no longer see my infant. I see a vibrant little girl, a clever little imp, a happy little child.

Parenting seems to me to be the most difficult ‘job’ in the world not because it’s hard to keep you alive or to ensure that you are prepared to enter the world, but because if I do it right, one day I have to let you go.

You and I have spent most of this month doing perfectly ordinary things – painting in your bedroom walls, cleaning the house together, swimming in your new pool, digging in the garden – but for some reason the last few weeks have been some of the happiest we’ve ever spent together.

I know I’ve said this before and I’m sure I’ll say it again, but watching you grow and learn is the greatest gift. Every day, you make new connections that astound me and every evening after you’re asleep your father and I regale each other with funny goings-on from our time with you. And when I’m curled up beside your father at the end of the day, telling him about how you amaze me with all the ideas that come to your head and all the words that you have managed to use so well, we are both struck by just how grateful we are to have you in our lives. And we are both struck by how happy you make us. I never knew that something as simple as playing "school" with your furry pets while you pretend to be their teacher could make all the difference in the world, but it does, and I love you for that.

Grow, little princess, grow.

We love you more than elephants love peanuts (and everyone knows that’s an awful lot),

Momma and Daddy

Lessons From a Loving Mom

I wrote a short little list (haha) and called it my Lessons From a Loving Mom, and I hope that through these experiences I can continue to offer my daughter a life full of happiness...

1. Kiss them often. You can't ever kiss your kids too much. Kiss them when they're young. And kiss them when they're old. 

2. Teach them. Remember they look up to you. They pick up on everything. Show them the world. Show them the beauty of life. Let their little brains explore.

3. Make Memories. Think of fun family activities to do. Go to the zoo. Go to the park. It's never too early to start traditions. As a family. Do crafts together. Bake cookies. Make finger paint. Make a sand castle. And repeat it every year. You will enjoy this time. And they will enjoy it even more.

4. Take pictures. Lots of them. Thousands! Who cares if they are sitting in the same pose... those facial expressions are honestly priceless. And? Save them all. Each and every one of them. Blow them up. Fill your house with pictures and be proud!  And I guarantee you will appreciate having these in the future.

5. Plan ahead. Think about the future. Plan for the future. Buy clothes ahead of time. Review your finances a year in advance. And remember, your child should always come first. 

6. Share. Share your child. Others want to love on him or her, or them. Let them. It's okay. Your child/children won't forget that you are the most important. And listen, you are. 

7. Read them Books. Every day. They are absorbing and absorbing. And in the midst of the reading they are cuddling on you. Loving you. Savor those moments.

8. Remember, there are two. Include your partner. Get his opinion. Allow him to make decisions as well. Remember, this is a first time for him too. 

9. Set rules. And set them early. Try to be consistent. Say No. Figure out when you need to draw the line. And these rules? Set them with family members as well. Don't be afraid.

10. Stand firm on your ground. This goes with number 9, but remember, you are affecting this child's future. You are the parent. Set your ground with those around you.

11. Loosen up. Contrary to number 10, remember that sometimes it's okay to just relax and let them be kids. Let them have some sweets. Let them watch TV just a little longer. They will be OK.

12. Never say never. Just when you think that you have this motherhood thing down, you do something, or say something, or something happens that completely contradicts what you may have said it prior to having a baby. And you know what, that too is OK.

13. Watch them. Every second. Accidents happen within seconds. A blink of an eye. And those tears... oh those tears. 

14. Write it down. You will forget. Those moments you can't get back. Those memories. Those milestones. I can't stress enough how important it is to write it down! Get a notebook. Write it in the blog. Somewhere where you can return to it. And? Make something of it. Make a book. Scrapbook. You will appreciate it later.

15. First milestones are important. And don't feel guilty going all out. Don't feel guilty not going all out. As long as you enjoy those moments, relive the year, and spoil that child with love, then that is all that matters. But remember, they are important. And these  days you can't get back to. You did it. You made it through all these important steps motherhood. That is important! 

16. Step away from the computer. And play with your child. Or just watch them. A child playing is one of the most beautiful things in life. They really are the most innocent individuals just discovering this little world around them. Do it. The social media can wait.

17. Whip out that video camera. Take it off the shelf. Wipe off the dust. And put it to good use. Pictures can only capture so much... a video can complete the memory. 

18. You can always do better. Never settle. Yes, you are a great mom... but you can always be better. Strive to your potential. Keep working at it. It doesn't happen overnight, but the love you have for the child makes it all worth it.

19. It only gets better. Just when you think you had a great month. Just when you think you love this age. It gets better. And I am convinced that this will continue for years to come.

20. Never regret. Don't "wish" you did this. Or that. Or why did I do this or that. Trust your decisions. Learn from them. And grow. Because at the end of the day....

You are that child's mother and no one can ever take that away from you.

21. Be patient. Yes it can be hard at times. Life can get busy. There isn't enough time in the day. But always remember to be patient. With your children. With your partner. And most importantly, with yourself.

22. If you take anything from all this, take this: You are a great mom. You are an amazing mom. You would do anything for your child. And your child is SO lucky to have you. :)

GUEST POST: How I Survived a Dire Diagnosis

Heather sent me an email the other day telling me a bit of what had happened to her and asked me if I could receive a guest post from her to share it in this blog so that others could read her amazing testimony of a person who has fought cancer and won! :) I hope you feel as blessed as I did when I read her story...

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Everyone experiences a time when they need to rely on others. You can be assured that a time will present itself when you will need to let your family and friends help you to get through, and this is something that happened to me when it seemed like the world was coming to an end. I was just 36 years old. 

My husband and I had family and friends all around us when our baby girl was born on August 4, 2005. Members of my family, his family and our cherished friends visited to meet the new addition to our family. It was such a wonderful time for us, so we were ill-prepared to accept what was about to disturb our happy home. 

I went back to work shortly after giving birth, and this is when our previously happy existence began to take a turn in the other direction. Weight began to fall off of me. I was losing between five and seven pounds each week. I was out of breath, felt exhausted and had no desire to do the things I needed to do. Being a working mother is very tiring, but I sensed that there was more to it than that. I decided to make an appointment with my doctor who performed several tests and discovered what was contributing to my lack of well-being. 

The diagnosis came on November 21, 2005 only three and a half months after giving birth to my daughter Lily. It was malignant pleural mesothelioma, known to be caused by exposure to asbestos. In my childhood, I was exposed to asbestos, and, as mesothelioma typically does, it took almost 30 years for the symptoms to present themselves. 

I was in utter shock when I got the news. I could only think of Lily. The doctor’s words were not very encouraging; he said that I would not live longer than 15 more months if I did not get treatment. My thoughts returned to my baby. As I looked into my husband’s eyes, all I could see was the love of my life and my precious baby surviving without me. At that moment, I vowed to do everything I could to stay with them. 

We decided to fight the disease very aggressively, and my husband accompanied me for my treatment in Boston. I visited one of the best mesothelioma doctors, and underwent a very extreme surgery called an extrapleural pneumonectomy. This involved the removal of my left lung and all of the surrounding tissue. After surgery I spend 18 days in the hospital recovering, and then even more time out of the hospital recovering. I eventually went through chemo and radiation treatments as well. I stayed strong and positive throughout all of this. I always had Lily on my mind and I was determined to recover as fast as I could so that I could get back to being a mother.

My parents help us out tremendously by taking care of Lily while I had surgery. Lily learned a lot while she was living with them. There were some firsts that any mother would be so sad to miss.. learning to eat solid foods, and learning to roll over, but I knew that I had to be away from her then in order to still be here today. This experience, although unfortunate, has shown our whole family that we must embrace each day, no matter what it throws our way. A lot of what we received from this experience was good, and I am eternally grateful.

My princess is a very funny girl!

I've said it before but I'll say it again, I think Micaela is hilarious. There is no doubt that she has both, her mommy and her daddy´s outgoing personality. You can ask anyone, they would certainly agree with me. She's one funny girl.

But lately, she is off the wall funny. The things she comes up with are unbelievable.

When Micaela cries we tell her that pretty girls don´t cry and that it is the Big bad wolf who is crying and she immediatly stops... Anyways, the other night Micaela was fussy. She was fine just coloring in her room taking it all in, then bam she wasn't happy coloring anymore so he starts to whine. Out of nowhere I hear my daughter shout, "Lobo feroz (Big bag wolf)....STOP IT!" Writing it out doesn't even do it justice. It was beyond hilarious and completely all her. She did it on her own. So demanding and so funny.

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The other morning during breakfast we were sitting at the table watching the birds in our garden. Micaela began this unbelievable story of the birds. There was a Mommy birdie, a Daddy birdie and even a baby Micaela birdie. Apparently the birdies were eating cereal, ironically that's what she was eating too.

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Micaela is an amazing story teller. She woke up at 2:00am one night and was crying for me. I went into her room and asked her what was wrong. She wanted some milk. Once I got her the milk she proceeded to tell me this grand story about Santa and the elfs (the same ones we had seen the day before at the mall). She went on and on about how the elfs where Santa´s friends and how they helped him make all the presents. Then she told me that they liked to dance and she was dancing just like they had done it.

I wanted to cry, I couldn't believe that this amazing child was actually mine. At one point I got her to lay down next to me, I didn't want to fall asleep I wanted to listen to more of her stories but at this point an hour had passed and I knew that she would still wake up early in the morning and I really didn't want to be a zombie when that happened. While laying next to me, her cheek was touching mine. She could feel my broad smile. I told her that I was very happy and that I loved her sooo much. So she took my face in her hands and said, "Amo mucho mami - Love you so much Mommy!"

Then I died...

That little girl of mine has no idea how much she has me wrapped around her finger!

2012: A year in review

2012 was good to us. The first half of the year continued our celebrating the remainder of Little Miss Micaela's "Firsts". Her first Christmas, her first steps, her first words, and of course, her First Birthday! We went from scurrying after a crawling baby to darting after a running toddler. We battled teething, fevers, rashes, colds, and "allergies". Trips to the emergency room and getting to know our pediatrician quite well. We kissed booboos and wiped little tears. We heard baby babble turn into words like "Mamita - Mommy" and "Papito - Daddy", (be still my heart, I will never forget that first moment I heard my little princess say "Mama - Momma"). We got to travel with Kathy and Nico and spent a lot of time with her grandma and grandpa.

Pablo and I each celebrated our second Mothers/Fathers Day and celebrated 3 years being together. Micaela watched her first 4D movie (and was not too thrilled by it, in fact, she was a bit scared).

Micaela developed a love affair with Mickey Mouse, all his buddies and Elmo. 

We laughed and cried together. We had bad days but definitely more good days. We are sad to see 2012 go, but we are SO ready for what 2013 has in store for us!!