We co-sleep!

Yup, you heard it right. We co-sleep. And now I am saying it loud enough for the whole world to hear it!

I love my family because they don't look down on me for it. If I were to bring this up outside of my special and so loving community, (those of whom co-sleep know about this, I would get "the look" and the "I would NEVER do that", "That is so dangerous", or even the "Good luck getting her into her own bed". 

There is such a awful stigma against it...

Excuse me while I growl. :)

Here are some facts:

1. Co-sleeping Can Further Both Trust and Independence: Children who shared sleep with their parents are actually more independent than their solo sleeping peers.

2. Parents Are the Ultimate Security Blankets: Children feel more secure as a result of being close to their caregivers and children who co-sleep do not need replacement security figures.

3. Co-sleeping Can Have Positive Effects on Self-Esteem and Family Closeness: A little one welcomed into the family bed receives countless hours more tender snuggles, and more affection than if she were left alone to sleep.

4. Children Who Co-sleep May Be Easier to Get Along With and Better Adjusted Than Their Solo Sleeping Peers.

5. Everyone Sleeps Better: Scientific studies have shown that a family who sleeps together actually enters the different stages of sleep together almost simultaneously.

I love that Micaela is right there when she needs us. I do not like the whole "let her cry it out" maybe when she is two and I know she is being stubborn, but at this age she is crying for a reason. Even if it is to be held, then obviously she needed to feel comforted, which does not make her "spoiled'. (double growl)

It also makes her night feeding a lot easier...

and everyone DOES sleep better!

Fun Fact: In a large group of child who co-slept there were no thumb suckers.

To answer the question: How do you co-sleep?

It is always with her own pillow between Pablo and I. She is in her literally under the same blanket as us.

Now, I don't plan on co-sleeping forever, I really want her to get use out of her adorable bed that we designed with much love and care. But, I really think everyone thinks this is such a taboo subject... 

so those of whom do co-sleep, be proud!

Advice for a growing girl

I’m sure you’ll grow up hearing my advice and get sick of it, but when you’re mad at me, come to this letter so you can see where I’m coming from.

When you were born my world changed. I had no idea it was possible to love someone—something as much as I love you. I want the best for you. I want you to be happy. I’ve had a happy life but I want you to be even happier.

Go for your dreams. Really, dream as big as you can and go for it. You can do anything; But while you’re dreaming big, also be sure to live in the here and now. Enjoy the present because before you know it, it’ll be the past. The worst feeling is wishing you had done something you didn’t do.

Know that goals can change, and that’s ok. You aren’t a failure for changing your mind. You’re brave for going for something new.

Don’t keep wishing for what others have. You’ll never have enough if you keep comparing yourself to others. Learn to be happy with what you have, and remember life is a journey, not a competition. Don’t waste the journey trying to outdo others.

Don’t waste time trying to please everyone. You can’t. Some people just won’t come around. Some people won’t like you just because of the way you look. It’s not right, but know that you’re better than that. Try to see the good in them still.

If there’s one word you should live by, let it be “love.” Love those who hate you, and those who love you back. Your compassion will shine through, and help others who need that light of positivity.

I’m sure once you’re a teenager there will be things we disagree on. Maybe your friends will be doing something you think isn’t a very big deal and I will think it is a VERY big deal. I just want you to know that I’d never do anything to intentionally hurt you. You’ll have to make your own mistakes, and I can’t make you learn from mine, but I will try to guide you in the right direction. When you mess up though, (we all do) never be afraid to call me. I will am here for you. Always.

When you are much much older and fall in love, know that I don’t care what your husband looks like. I care about how he treats you. And the person who earns your heart should love you for your beauty inside.

Someday, when you have children of your own you’ll know how much I love you, and you’ll understand where I’m coming from.

I send these words from my heart to yours, and hope you’ll keep them close. You’ve changed my life. I love you.

Moth·er [muhth-er] (noun)

Mother [muhth-er] (noun): One person who does the work of twenty. For free. For unconditional love.

"While we teach our children all about life, our children teach us what life is all about."

Today I wanted to remind myself than I am more than just a "stay-at-home-work-at-home-mom" raising my daughter. I am incredibly blessed that I can stay at home with Micaela and raise her. I also need to remind myself that I need to keep on showing all my patience with my little princess. We are entering the stage of small temper tantrums because she sometimes doesn't get things her way. It's hard being a mother in general but It is also the most beautiful thing that can happen to you. Being a mom doesn't come with a handbook of instructions and living the adventure day by day is what makes it so awesome.

And even when things are not easy, I know at the end of the day that my little princess loves me and I love her more than anything in the entire world. I hope she will someday understand that this has been a learning process for both of us. I don't ever want to get upset or yell at her. I am just trying to teach her as her mother and she is teaching me too!

Life flies by

I want you to know that life flies by in seconds. It truly does.

I blinked the other day and you grew up. You were sitting on my lap in the afternoon, your sweet baby scent still lingering and your chubby fingers tangled in mine.I held you and whispered to you and the next moment, you were gone.

Well. Not gone... Just changed.

I’m learning things you see. Life flies by. It truly does.

Things change, they always do. My sweet newborn was replaced with a wriggling changing infant that will soon become a defiant fiery toddler. :)

I’d learn one thing and then be taught another.

You’d grow. I’d grow. We changed and not always together.

And here is the truth I’ve learnt. Life flies by. It truly does.

There is agony and bliss. There are some aches that feel as if surely they cannot mend. There are some highs that make your soul rejoice and your heart swell until it cannot fill any further.

But all I have is this moment. This moment right now with you.

And I am exactly where I want to be!

Lessons learned

I have approached the sixteenth-month mark of being a mother and I sit and think of the many ways I've changed. Some changes for the better, other changes, not so much. One thing is for sure, Micaela has made irreversible changes in my life and my being.

I can easily sit here and say how she's made me unbelievably happy and how she's provided me with an unexplainable sense of fulfillment, that's a given; it goes much deeper than that. Life has meaning now. A meaning it never had before. It has purpose. I'm here to be Micaela's mom. Not just for sixteen months, but for the rest of my life. I'm here to watch her grow. I'm here to not only teach, but to also learn from this tiny person that has already taught me so much.

These past few incredible months have been full of lessons. Micaela the teacher, me the student. I've learned many things. Above all, I've learned the true meaning of love, what it feels like to love someone more than life itself. Which brings me to the changes. Nothing matters as much to me as my daughter, my husband, my family. I'm not the same Cynthia, I'm different in more ways than one. Sixteen months ago I lost a small part of myself, of who I was, but that's perfectly fine, because I became a mom. Forever.

6 things I want you to know

Right now, you are sixteen months and some days old. Everything delights you, and I treasure each moment you discover something new and that beautiful smile spreads across your beautiful cheeks.

I’ll be honest with you, life is going to throw some things at you that might challenge that smile. Don’t worry, though. The moments of darkness exist only to help us appreciate the moments of light.

I’d like to try and save you from some heartache, although I know that I can’t protect you from everything hurtful in this world. I’m stubborn, though, like you, so here are some things that I want you to know ahead of time.

1. I’ll embarrass you...

But then you will need me and realize that even if I do hug and kiss you in public, I am not so bad. Although you wouldn’t mind if I lost the lame sweater.

2. He’ll break your heart...

But you’ll get over him and realize that he wasn’t so cool to begin with. Trust me, teenage boys with acoustic guitars are a dime a dozen. Even if they have shag haircuts.

3. You’ll say something you regret...

But you will also realize the power of a sincere apology and time. Not necessarily in that order.

4. You’ll make the wrong choice...

But that wrong choice will lead you down a path you might not have otherwise taken, so it’ll all work out in the end. It just might take a while to realize that!

5. You’ll realize that I made mistakes...

But then you’ll also realize that I am doing my best and doing it out of love. And you will promise to never do some of the things that I did when you have your own daughter.

6. You’ll realize that you want to have your own daughter...

And you will come to find that you are an incredible woman who is capable of more love, warmth, empathy, and spirit than you ever imagined.

I love you, my little princess!

Wong´s annual parade turns 25!

We've been exhausted all day yesterday, but it was a good exhausted. We had a blast on Sunday.  Wong´s annual parade will always hold a special place in my heart. I have the best memories of this event.

I remember attending with my parents and my sister since I was like... a year or two old! We used to live in Miraflores, where the parade takes place, so it was something we couldn´t miss! So many people come for this parade (reporters even said that this year there were more than 50,000 people... Wow! Can you picture that?). It's like a very important reunion every year. 

Family and friends get together and sit and watch the parade that passes right in front of them. And this year, thanks to our Wong friends, we had Prime seats! 

This year we were really looking forward to it and we went with my sister and my brother in law who had never had the chance to enjoy it before. I am so happy my little princess could experience it too. This was Micaela's 1st time viewing the parade. And she got it right away! It was wonderful to see my little one just sit and watch the entire thing while eating all the goodies mommy and daddy had bought. 

Seeing her face light up at the fire trucks and how happy she got when the clowns appeared. That's the memories I have from being little. The ones I cherish so, I hope she holds onto these little things. Someday, she will realize how big they actually are. 

We arrived home and Micaela was already asleep. She truly enjoyed the parade and Pablo and I enjoyed it twice as much as her just by seeing our little lovie so happy and mesmerized. I think her favorites were the dragons, the lions, the clowns, the toys from Hasbro, and the huge dinosaur from the movie: A night at the Museum.

I love making these memories, even if she is young and may not totally remember them. 

And of course, one more time, I must say: Thank you Wong for changing our lives and making them happier and more special every day!

Strength and beauty: an open letter to moms everywhere...

You are strong!

You have carried your child.  In your arms – night and day – playing, rocking, strolling, comforting.  In your heart – night and day – celebrating, hoping, supporting, grieving. Your long hours do not go unnoticed. Your sacrifice for others is not missed. Your love for your family strengthens you and lifts you up in the midst of discouragement. You recognize that life is not usually glamorous – but you keep going anyway – because your eyes are set on the things that matter most.

        

You are beautiful!

Your body nurtured your child for many months – you held and protected them when no one else could. Your love and compassion flow as you care for others, while often not taking the same time for yourself. You were created with the utmost love, care, and purpose. Your life is a reflection of the things that you hold close – the beauty of your children, your family, your passion – it is evident with one look in your eyes.

        

So you, yes – you, quit selling yourself short.  Forget the days of second guesses and self hate disappear. Realize how important you are, how valuable you are, how loved you are.  Remember the look in your child’s eyes as they stare up at you, knowing that you can and will do everything you can to meet their needs. Remember the beauty of love and settle for nothing less. Days will not always be full of smiles, giggles, and rainbows – but your significance will never change. In the dark days, hold tight to the things that you know, the things that you believe in, the things that give you purpose. And keep your head up, because the other days – you know, the ones that just feel perfect – they will come too.  They will sneak up and surprise you and make you fall in love with life all over again.  So, no matter what, always remember:

You are strong!  You are beautiful!

And most important: You are a mom!

On becoming a mom

Becoming a mother is a strange thing. I still don't truly feel that I "am" a mother. I feel I am in a constant state of becoming. Every day I learn new things; new ways to love, new ways to grow. Micaela is now 16 months old, and she has been in the real world just a bit longer than she was in my body. 

 

Becoming a mother is the most strange and glorious thing that has ever happened to me. 

It is so strange how much love you can feel for someone you have never met. Someone who doesn't even really exist independently of you at first. No idea if they are a boy or a girl, what they will look like, if they will be healthy, what their personality will be like. It is coupled with the anxiety and the fear of the unknown. It is a strange feeling to be so attached to something so tiny and miraculous, and something which is now so out of your control. 

Then the moment comes when your baby actually breathes. When she is there in front of you, and you embark on the next leg of your amazing journey. All of a sudden there is this new life that you are responsible for. She is small and precious and so incredibly fragile. She relies on you to survive, to give her love, to teach her how to live and learn and grow. It is an unbelievably huge amount of responsibility to lay upon someone. And yet, it is so utterly wonderful that there is no way I would trade it for the world. 

It is impossible to remember my world without her. This was something that didn't need to creep up on me slowly. It was just an instant switch when she was born. While I was pregnant, it was still so abstract to think of this new life that would be with us soon. After she was born it was so overwhelming. Learning all the things you need to learn in order to care for this new being is not easy. Or at least it wasn´t for me. I´ve loved her like no other and that makes all the difficulties fade away. And now I realize that there is no way I could imagine my life without my daughter. She is a part of me and a part of  Pablo as well. 

Becoming a mother is a constant struggle. It is hard work. I still have those moments every day when I am amazed that I am actually a Mom. There are nights full of tears, moments of self-doubt, frustrations galore. There are days when I feel like it is impossible, and that things shouldn't be this hard. 

But there are also moments where I feel like my heart will burst with love and happiness. Moments where I look at her and think that there could not be a more perfect being in existence. There are times when Pablo and I laugh so hard our bellies hurt at the crazy things she does. We have moments (almost all moments) where we are practically exploding with pride and love. 

Becoming a mother is bittersweet. Watching her learn and grow and accomplish amazing things. Watching her discover the world around her and discover all the cool things our bodies can do. Cheering for her as she learned how to sit, how to crawl, how to clap, how to wave. And at the same time feeling the regret that she is growing so fast, and that these moments are passing us by and will never be experienced again. Packing away her little sleepers, her small clothes, her tiny shoes; these are moments that bring tears to my eyes. Tears of happiness and pride for the child she is becoming, and also tears of saying goodbye to the little baby she once was. 

 

Becoming a mother is my greatest accomplishment. It is something that I could never imagine not having done. Looking into the eyes of my daughter, I see what pure love looks like, feel what pure devotion feels like, and know the reason for my existence. 

Becoming. Evolving. Emerging. Growing. Transforming. 

As I watch her accomplish these feats, so do I become a mother. 

A tiny note from me to you

Dear Micaela:

Some mornings I look at you and I swear you've grown over night. I used to get sad at the thought of you growing up but you know what? The grown up Micaela is so much fun and I'm loving these days 10x more than I ever imagined I would. While I'll always yearn for those cuddly newborn months, I'm looking forward (with much expectation) to the future with you.

Love,
Mom

Mini me?

Micaela, you are growing and changing each and every day.  Before you were born your dad and I were so curious about how you would look when you were born.  Whose physical traits would you carry, who would you look like, whose nose/chin/eyes would you have?  Those questions were quickly answered and it has been so fun to see the ways that each of us are reflected in you.  I know, though, that these reflections of each of us do not stop here – there will be etchings of your father and I in your personality, your habits, your day to day life.  There are things that I hope to see and things that I hope to never see – here are a few of those…

Your Head – I hope that you value your education. This is something that has been very important to your dad and me.  It wasn’t always easy, but I am so thankful that we pursued education. This knowledge did not stop in school – you will have so many opportunities to learn every single day of your life.

Your Heart – Your dad is one of the kindest people that I know.  He always says that he hopes you have my heart, but I hope that you have his.  Compassion, mercy, humility, grace – some of these things most people struggle with daily, but I hope that they come easily for you.  If they don’t, then I want you to know that these qualities are worth the effort to live out every day.

Your Hands – I hope that you find something that you love and are passionate about and you chase after that thing.  I love the passion that your dad has for his designs – it is inspiring and there is nothing like seeing him doing the things that he loves.  I can’t wait for you to discover your passion and pursue it – we will always be here to support you.

My wish is not that you are a replica of me or your dad, but that you can take the very best of both of us and become the “you” that you were meant to be.  You are our baby – nothing will change that – and just like I see my smile and your dad’s expressions every time I look into your face, I see my gentleness and your dad’s passion each time I look into your heart.

Much love sweet little princess of mine!

That smile

Being a Mom is tough. In all honesty, I don't think I ever appreciated my Mother the way I should have until the birth of Micaela. I acquired a whole new level of respect for her. I'm not sure I've told her this yet, but I will. As Mica's momma, some days can be a real challenge. Usually days when she is not feeling well (teething, fever, little cold). These days can seem never-ending. Last night, for example. Our day was, as it usually is, wonderful. Afterwards? Not so much. She was a ball of tears. All. Night. Long. She only wanted to be held...by HER DAD. She was fussy and clingy. I felt defeated. I felt so sad and frustrated. I truly hate when she´s not feeling well. But, the next morning? She was back to her normal self again. She was happy and cheerful. Playing and running around making her usual mess. Just like that. And just that quickly, that rough night we'd had the day prior? Forgotten. You see, these terrible days, they just make this magical journey of Motherhood that much better. They strengthen your patience. They allow you (or, at least they do me) to truly appreciate each and every moment you spend with your children. I appreciate her health and her happiness. There will be rough days and I will feel frustrated. I will feel my patience begin to dwindle. But, I'll remember that these days are few and far between. We will get through it. Also, one look at her smile, and all is right in my world.

In the beginning...

On the 15th March 2011 at approximately 10:30pm my daughter was born via cesarean section. She weighed 3kg 680g and was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen.

We called her Micaela, a name we had decided on months before she arrived. We spent the next few hours in awe of our little princess, almost finding it hard to believe that she was actually real. It finally kicked in the first time she filled her nappy, and we realized that it was now our duty to clean her up.

I spent the next few days in hospital recovering but as soon as I was up and about I was discharged and eager to get my beautiful one home.

The days that followed were challenging and tiring as both me and daddy tried to adjust to the changes little Micaela had brought in to our lives. Eventually we got into the swing of things and realized that she wasn't going to break in two every time we picked her up.

She's now 16 months old and I all I want is to share all the special moments (as well as the not so special moments) with my family and friends.

I hope you are all enjoying it as much as I am!

I ♥ Wong (and you should too!)

I absolutely love Wong Supermarkets, if you don’t have one by you then you are missing out. I am at Wong at least five times a week but usually more.  Since Micaela was three months old we have been there pretty much every other day.  During that time, I got to know a lot of the staff at my favorite Wong ever (Wong de Ate) and many of them are still there now. It is always great to go food shopping and see happy familiar faces.  :)

Helping papapa (great grandpa) with his groceries!

Auntie Rossi and Auntie Mechita on my 1st birthday :)

So what are you waiting for? Head over to Wong now and get shopping!

Dear Micaela

Dear Micaela,

You, my darling, are 16 months old today. I can not believe how quickly time has flown. You are just as I envisioned you would be as a toddler. Vivacious, smart, determined, and strong-willed. You have become quite the chatterbox. Although, as much as we act like we do, we don't understand a word you are saying. You have your own little language and it's wonderful. It's such an amazing feeling to see you thrive. To see you repeat the words we ask you to say. To watch you explore the world around you with such inquisitive eyes. To attempt to do things all on your own, without the least bit of fear or apprehension. But with a steadfast determination to get it done. Even though you stole our hearts a very long time ago, some how, in your own little way, you steal a little bit more each day. With each little hug or kiss or just to hear you say 'mamá' or 'papá' it melts us. We are puddy in your little hands. Do what you will with us.

I often find myself with tears in my eyes as I've sat and watched you play with a new toy or flip through the pages of one of your books. It's hard to put into words why those tears are there. From happiness? Love? Admiration towards God's amazing gifts? Or maybe, All of it! Happy that you are growing and reaching each and every milestone. Happy that you are healthy. Happy that you are ours. Love that continues to triple and quadruple each day. Love that binds us together forever. You have allowed me to put more faith in God. I thank Him each and every day, I thank Him for giving us: you. You are our greatest blessing.

 

As you continue to grow I will keep each and every moment spent with you locked in my heart. Each memory tucked away. You are growing so, so fast. What I would give to make time stand still. To keep you this small forever. To keep you safe from the world around you, always. But, that would be impossible. Therefore, I will cherish these days. I will embrace each coming stage joyfully. With you each day is an adventure and never dull.

Let the journey continue. I love you Micaela.

Always and Always,

Your Mommy

Hush, little baby, don´t say a word...

momma's gonna buy you a mockingbird

and if that mockingbird won't sing,

momma's gonna buy you a diamond ring

and if that diamond ring turns brass,

momma's gonna buy you a looking glass

and if that looking glass gets broke,

momma's gonna buy you a billy goat

and if that billy goat won't pull,

momma's gonna buy you a cart and bull

and if that cart and bull fall down,

you'll still be the sweetest little baby in town

**nighty~night sweetheart**

I love all the pictures of my sleeping beauty!

What I want you to know when you are grown

It’s a cold autumn night, although we expected it to be colder by this time of the year.

You are almost 16 months old and your father and I are besotted with you. Whenever you read this, I hope that you know that to your core. My prayer, with every breath as we lay down with your milk bottle in the glow of lamplight or as you lay on the floor rolling and squealing with delight and discovery, is that you will always know you are loved and worthy of it.

A few days ago I decided to write this letter for you. It’s gone through many drafts and stops and starts since then. There is so much, a universe I want to guide you through, so much I want to make sure you know. When I see the light and joy behind your eyes, and (already!) the anger and determination there too, I wonder how I am ever going to keep up with you and everything you need.

I have no idea what might transpire between the time that I look at you now and when you read this letter. I do know myself, and your dad, and what we are determined to give you… The things we want to teach you are really detailed and really nebulous… Love and understanding of the world around you, and ability to put yourself in the place of others and be willing to do whatever you can to help them… Passion for doing what is right, and determination to stand by your beliefs and be able to explain them without alienating others but opening their minds and hopefully opening your own.

When I think of the you that will read this letter, I see a bright and determine blonde beauty, maybe 20 years old – maybe 16… and I think of myself at those ages. Your grandparents were born to be parents. They raised me to be interested in the world around me and to become an adult ready to interact with that world fully. I want the same for you. But I know that in the craziness of being a family, and raising you, and making sure you know how to be that person you are becoming, I may not communicate everything I hope for you.

The world around us is full of beautiful things and difficult things, and all of it is going to shape you and change you and challenge you into being an amazing young woman. I can’t wait to know you as that person. Never think that I don’t want to listen to what you’re thinking and feeling. I can’t think of anything more important than knowing my family and what is in their hearts. You and your father are the blessing I never thought I would have.

You are at the threshold of life, and there is so much in front of you. If you don’t realize or know it yet, I am behind you, I want you to excel in whatever you want to do and whatever it is you are passionate about. There may be times, I know there will be, when I will tell you truthfully what I think about things you do or say, but even if it is critical it does not change how much I care about you and the person you are. In fact, I tell you honestly what I think because I love you.

If I could tell you one thing that helped me most in the first ten years of my “adult life”, before you, it would be this:

The only person you can truly change is yourself.

I know, it’s pretty straight forward, seemingly obvious… and, after living with me for 16 to 20 years, I am certain you’ve heard it a few times. There are some big reasons why this phrase is important to me.

The only person you really have complete “control” over is yourself, and it should be the only person you control… and that alone is a difficult job at times! Changing yourself is something you ought to do for yourself first, and most of the time only yourself. Don’t let anyone tell you that you are unworthy or make you feel as if you cannot do what you know you can do.

There will be people in your life that you will fall for, that you will love or admire, that you will want to impress for reasons good and bad… they are the people you want to change for, and at times they are the people you think you can change. I have the privilege right now to help shape you and how you see the world, but I would never want to try and change your (already!) vibrant and sweet determined nature for the world. No matter how much you love another person and desperately desire them to change, the most you can ever do is love them and let them know you want to help. You can pray, you can be the best influence you can be, but they must make the choice to change if they need to.

And that’s the other thing that I have the blessing of seeing in you: the choices you make, good and bad, that will make you. You will see me make choices too, I can’t guarantee that they will always be best, but I can promise with all my heart that the choices I make have been and will be with your contentment and happiness in mind. Right now, the choices I see you make are whether to roll over or stay put, to reach for my coffee mug or to dance, read, or play… soon they’ll get bigger and bigger. No matter how big or small, I am your mother and I will always be here cheering you on a praying the best into your life.

I love you my little princess,

Thank you for making me your mom!

Why I blog about you

You are getting so big, so fast. I can’t believe how far we’ve come. You are so smart and the things you say amaze me every single day. The connections you make and your memory shocks me. You make me crazy but you make me so happy, I don’t think you can have one without the other. Often we are so much alike and that makes for some serious fireworks in our house, we don´t like to go to sleep, right? But it’s what makes you, YOU and I love every bit of it.

You tell me you want "pum" because you want us to take you to the circus, mama! You tell me you want "ame" and it’s up to me to figure out if you want a your toys, your books, or your dolls. With a little guidance you learn to correctly pronounce words. You could talk for hours on the phone to no one in particular. How did you get so old?

You now go to your nursery school and off with your friends and teacher after a quick kiss and hug. But there are still days were you are my tiny - baby girl and you want nothing more to stay with mama. I hate to see you cry for me or cry at all. Hate it.

You are incredibly strong-willed and a damn good communicator. Don’t ever let anyone tell you those are bad traits to have. You are no softy. Daddy throws you around like a rag doll as you squeal with delight saying “ma, papá, ma!!!!” (more, daddy, more!). Although you do have a very tender heart who gives lots of hugs to anyone who needs them. And who wouldn’t want a hug from you with that beautiful face of yours twisted with concern. You randomly demand group hugs and it doesn’t matter where we are, like the middle of Wong. I’ll be 110 years old and never stop wanting to give you kisses. I promise to always be your dance partner, I could fake ballroom dance with you for hours or rock out to Lady Gaga if you choose. I will be here with you every step of the way.

Life is hard and sometimes downright sucks. I want to protect you from it all but I can’t and really it only makes you a stronger woman. It hurts me to see you hurt but we both know you will be strong enough to handle things before needing your mama.

My only hope is that one day you can read these stories about you growing up and understand how awesome you really are. Memories of things you won’t remember. Maybe I document too much but it reminds me how far we’ve come in this journey together. I don’t mean to cause you any embarrassment, you are hilarious and it just shows how you make our lives full because without you there wouldn’t be any meaning to it anymore.

Parenting can be impossibly hard and I document the good and the bad, for you. You are why I write.

Life Lesson #1 for my beautiful princess: You can’t always have what you want but everything you need is right at your fingertips.