Where is your instruction manual Micaela?

It's been 15 months. 15 months since my life took on a new meaning. 15 months since I've been a Momma. It's been the best 15 months of my life so far (everyday it just keeps on getting better}) When I first found out I was expecting a baby I wasn't the least bit nervous. I wasn't scared or anxious. I felt confident. 

Let me just say that confidence has been tested in these last 15 months. When you were only 1 month and a half someone told me that you had to follow every sound around you and you actually didn´t, you would just jump a bit if you heard any loud noise, but that was it... so I freaked out and started throwing stuff around to see if you reacted to the awful sounds I was producing, even though I had already read that, for you to follow sounds you had to be 3 months or older...  A few days ago I had another tiny, little melt-down. Nothing dramatic. You couldn´t breathe well and we rubbed your chest and back with Mentholatum. We thought you felt much better once we did that. But, I started reading some parenting blogs and based on what I read, at this stage, Maicaela shouldn´t have been rubbed with Mentholatum! Huh? Really?? Then suddenly you started to cough... I felt so guilty. I felt as though I let my Lovie down. WHY had I suggested the rubbing?? SO many negative thoughts crept into my head. 
I talked to daddy and told him what I'd read. You know what he said? His words: "Don´t worry, she´ll be okay." And just like that, I felt better. 

15 months ago, when I walked out of the hospital with my rosy-cheeked, pink bundle, I didn't receive an instruction manual. And as much as my mom has been there for me, guiding me with her insight and amazing wisdom, it really has come down to me and Pablo just figuring it out. We've dealt with high fevers, runny noses, a teething and fussy baby, long nights, no sleep, and multiple other issues in these last 15 months. But you know what? We're doing it. We're figuring things out. And every single time I look at my beautiful baby girl and see how fast she's growing and how much she's learning, I understand that we´re also learning. Of course there will be mistakes, and possibly a lot of failed attempts at things. But the tiny triumphs and the wonderful feeling that I get knowing that we're doing what's best for our baby and our family, makes this adventure we're on even more amazing.

I know there's so much more to learn, and this anxious Momma and her loving partner are ready to learn.